Monday, July 25, 2011

Things not to say during sex...

I have to poop

Smile for the camera

Get off me, I’ll do it myself

This is your first time, right?

You’re almost as good as my ex!

When is this supposed to feel good?

I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!

I was so horny tonight I would have taken a sheep home

Keep it down; my mother is a light sleeper

Hey! My friends were right, you are good!

On second thought, let’s turn the lights off

I’m sobering up and you are getting ugly

But everybody looks funny naked

Do I have to pay for this?

Actually your sister “likes” it like this

Um what’s your name again?

Hold on, let me change the channel

It’s nice to be in bed with someone I don’t have to inflate

Uhh, I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago

1 comment:

  1. you forgot "it's nice to have sex with someone other than myself". I've heard that a few times!

    ReplyDelete